The World Cup's Biggest Miss Wasn't a Penalty Kick!
- Julie Jones
- 6 days ago
- 5 min read
“No thanks!” Four guys, on the world’s biggest stage, said, “No thanks!”
I still can’t get it out of my mind. I’m not sure if I’m stunned or fascinated. But the 2026 World Cup gave us one of the most riveting mental performance lessons I've seen in years.
In case you missed it, Germany found itself in a shootout against Paraguay with the country’s tournament on the line. From what I understand, when it came time to choose the next guy up to shoot, several players reportedly declined the opportunity. The responsibility eventually fell to center back Jonathan Tah, who had never taken a penalty in a professional match. He stepped forward, missed the kick, and Germany's World Cup came to an end.
Fascinating. Almost unbelievable.
Before we go any further, this isn't about criticizing those players.
We don’t know what was going through their minds in that moment. None of us has carried the weight of an entire country watching from behind a television screen, let alone thousands of fans screaming right in front of you! It is easy to judge from the couch.
In fact, I had a conversation on Friday with Tori Penso, the first American woman to referee a World Cup game, and she agreed. She and other officials are charged with watching matches in which they are participating. As we all do, a few guys questioned a decision, and she immediately said, “We have no idea what he really saw or the full circumstances that led to that” …whatever that was!
Isn’t that the truth? The world is full of armchair quarterbacks who now think they can share their “expertise” (which was probably junior high soccer) with the world!
But as we have discussed, nauseum (only because it is true) pressure has a way of changing how all of us think.
Even at the highest levels of performance, the mental battle isn't about talent. It's about the stories our brains tell us when the stakes are highest.
What's worse? Our brain is an unreliable narrator under pressure!!!
But we’ve been taught to trust our gut! So shouldn't we trust our thoughts and the way we feel? Not always.
Neuroscientist Lisa Feldman Barrett argues that our brains don't simply react to the world.
They constantly predict what's about to happen based on past experiences, emotions, and expectations.
In other words, our brain doesn't wait for reality. It tries to get there first.
Sometimes that's helpful. Sometimes it's wildly inaccurate.
Standing over a penalty kick, your brain might predict, "If I miss, everyone will remember me forever as the guy who choked." "I'll let my teammates down." "This could end my career." “I’ll let my country down!”
None of those are facts. They're predictions.
Yet under pressure, our brains often treat those predictions as reality.
Psychiatrist Aaron Beck, one of the founders of cognitive therapy, called these automatic thoughts, the rapid stories that pop into our minds before we've had time to evaluate whether they're actually true.
The problem isn't that we have automatic thoughts. The problem is that we often believe them without questioning them.
Most of our automatic thoughts can be traced back to four common fears I see in athletes every week:
Rejection – What will people think of me?
Ruin – What if this costs me everything?
Regret – What if I wish I hadn't stepped up?
Responsibility – What if I'm the reason we lose?
These fears aren't unique to elite athletes. They're human. They show up in classrooms, boardrooms, operating rooms, job interviews and relationships. And every athletic competition you've ever played.
The question isn't whether these fears will appear. The question is...what will you do when they do?
Psychologist Albert Ellis believed that events themselves don't create our emotions. Our beliefs about those events do.
That's why he developed the ABCDE Model, with one of its most powerful steps being disputation. This framework allows us to identify and challenge irrational thoughts that lead us to negative emotional consequences in any situation!
The letters stand for:
Activating event or adversity
Beliefs about the event
Consequences, both emotional and behavioral
Disputing the irrational beliefs
Effects or new energy we feel after the process
In simple terms...we CHALLENGE THE STORY!
When our brain says..."I'm going to choke", we ask…is that a fact...or a prediction? What evidence supports that thought? What evidence challenges it? What's a more accurate story?
It’s much like Byron Katie’s “The Work,” where she suggests we ask four questions. Is it true? Can you absolutely know that it’s true? How do you react when you believe that thought? Who would you be without the thought?
In either framework, we're not replacing a negative thought with a positive one. We're replacing an inaccurate story with a more truthful one.
That's mental performance.
I realize all these questions cannot be asked when we have little time on the pitch or in a meeting. However, if we plan for scenarios that challenge us, we give ourselves a fighting chance.
If my name gets called...
If I don't feel confident...
If my heart starts racing...
If everyone is watching...
Then we decide:
What will I say to myself?
Where will I place my attention?
How will I breathe?
What is the very next action I'll commit to?
And let’s not pretend we aren’t talking to ourselves anyway! That’s what got us into the situation in the first place! We are telling stories. We are predicting. We are time traveling.
We can ask questions instead!
So, the next time you notice fear creeping in, don't try to silence it. Get curious.
Ask yourself:
What story is my brain telling me right now?
Which of the Four Fears is driving it?
What evidence actually supports this story?
What's a more accurate interpretation of what's happening?
You may discover that your biggest opponent isn't the pressure. It's the prediction. And predictions can be questioned.
Want to dive deeper?
One of my favorite exercises with athletes is called Facing Your Fears Like a Champion. It walks us through identifying our biggest performance fears, uncovering the stories behind them and using Albert Ellis' evidence-based ABCDE framework to challenge those stories and build more accurate thinking.
If you'd like a free copy of the worksheet, simply reply to this email or send me a message with "Facing My Fears," and I'll send it your way.
And as brilliant 17th-century poet, John Milton, said, which rings true on competition fields today, "The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven."
When your name gets called, your brain will tell you a story.
REMEMBER, you tell fictitious stories! You're a pro...just like I am. But we both can question them, then choose the one that helps us perform.
Heaven or hell? It isn't too hard to figure out which one gives us a chance to be our best!
Manage the moments!!
Julie
Julie Jones
Mental Performance Coach
SSB Performance
juliej@ssbperformance.com • 234-206-0946
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