From Stuck to Available. Why Peak Performance Requires Flexibility
- Julie Jones
- Jun 30
- 5 min read
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You’ve probably heard the saying “you can’t read the label from inside the jar”. That’s not just a clever metaphor; it’s a truth backed by performance science. When we’re so deep inside our emotions or identity that we can’t step back, reflect and adjust, we’ve lost access to one of the most important skills in sport and life: psychological flexibility…and availability!
That’s where the jar comes in.
We can think of our internal world, our self-talk, nerves, frustration and pressure as the stuff inside the jar. It swirls and shakes. And when we’re sealed up in there, good luck reading the label. We lose clarity, responsiveness and sometimes our purpose.
But when we pause, zoom out and observe what’s happening rather than reacting blindly to it? When we OTL (observe the landscape…inside and out) …we become the container. We create space between the stimulus and our response.
Bond et. al. (2011) define psychological flexibility as “the ability to stay in contact with the present moment, regardless of unpleasant thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations, while choosing one's behavior based on the situation and personal values.”
Kris Lewandoski and Julie Jones 😊 define availability as “being ready both physically and mentally to use your talent and training to win what’s in front of you.”
You can see that my favorite strength coach (Kris) and I are not as fluent in research vernacular as Bond and team, but we all realize that being our best requires us to manage what’s in the jar and read the label at the same time!
And that’s the difference between surviving and performing.
I’m working with a high-level pitcher who got sent home from his summer league to get his mental game in order. He’s got what it takes…physically. But we are finding ways to keep him flexible and available so he can use his talent and training to their fullest potential.
Right now, the lesson is, the more we think, especially about how we feel, the worse we are.
He’s humming along – K after K. Then a walk and …. he’s inside the jar.
The walk (an external circumstance) is met with an internal cacophony of noise, non-productive self-talk, heightened heart rate, brain waves, etc. What happened changes the way we manage what’s in the container. It gets all shook up! The more tangled we get in our thoughts (“I can’t do this”), the more we believe them.
But…our thoughts often aren’t true. I’ve heard this several times in several different places before. Start saying, “I can’t raise my right arm”. As you are saying this over and over, raise your right arm.
Could you raise your right arm? I’ll bet you $100.00 you could! Because the thought and the action aren’t the same thing.
In fact, if you say the same thing over and over and over, the words lose meaning.
Try it. What is something you often say to yourself that keeps you locked inside the jar? Is it “I can’t” or “I’m not good enough to…”
Say it out loud for 60 seconds. (It will seem like an eternity.)
After those 60 seconds, you’ll quickly learn that those words lose their meaning. THEY ARE JUST WORDS. And as we highlight almost every week, we can choose other ones!
And as we highlighted when we raised our arm, words and actions are NOT THE SAME!
What’s in the container doesn’t matter. What’s in front of us does.
It’s time to figure out how to be aware of what we’re feeling or saying without BECOMING what we’re feeling or saying. This is called self-as-context. It’s back to our availability: being fully present, coachable and focused, even when pressure kicks in.
When we’re inside the jar, it’s hard to gather information, change our focus and adapt. As actor Will Smith says, we need to stop thinking about the outcome…the mistake…whatever had us bound up. He says, "Stop thinking about the wall, there is no wall, there are only bricks. Your job is to lay this brick perfectly, then move on to the next brick." It’s about focusing on the immediate task at hand rather than being overwhelmed by how we feel or the larger picture.
High performers have unproductive thoughts, too. They have a jar. The difference is that they don’t suppress their thoughts. They don’t spend time thinking about how they feel, and they don’t let themselves become their thoughts or feelings. They notice them. Then, they redirect attention toward W.I.N., the demands of the task, the changes in what’s going on around them and inside of them.
Then they figure out how to use it all to their advantage…comfortable or not! (And their usually not comfortable!)
They keep what matters front and center. They create some space between the stuff in the jar, knowing what’s in the jar is not who they are, it’s how they feel. And they figure out that if they are in the jar, they can’t read the contents and decide how to use what’s in there or work despite the ingredients.
It comes down to awareness, adaptability and presence. And these give us the opportunity to be our best!
A few ways we can help ourselves, aside from proving our thoughts and words are just that (raise your arm 😊), we can ask ourselves a few questions if we can’t read the label. A few good ones might be: What would an outsider see right now? What’s one thing I might not be noticing?
We can practice separating ourselves from our thoughts. Notice the thought that says, “I’m having the thought that I’m not ready.” Then ask, “What would I do right now if I didn’t believe that thought?”
ACTION. AGENCY. ADAPTABILITY!
When we get distracted by emotion, we can ask: What matters most right now? What does the situation require from me? What action reflects who I want to be? Then choose the next best action that matches the answer.
Questions force us to look for solutions…and when we are searching for solutions, we are thinking about how we feel.
Finally, just as we can’t see the label from inside the jar, we need trusted others, coaches, mentors, teammates, to hold up a mirror. They help us detect blind spots. They offer neutral insight during emotional storms and we must remember that they are looking out a different window…they have information we need.
If our jar is closed so tightly that we need one of those rubber things to help us twist of the lid, we’ll never be able to gather information from them or anyone trying to help!
To get what we need, to be who we want to be, to be our best, we must be flexible and available!
To be both, we must remember, we are bigger than our inner experiences. They are there and we can still be HERE! We are not our thoughts. We are not our feelings. We are the container big enough to hold them and still choose what matters most.
The ability to notice our experience without being ruled by it, to read the label from outside the jar, and to be the container rather than the contents—all of these capacities are what allow us to respond rather than react, stay connected to our values and adapt under pressure.
Sometimes the best way to move forward is to step outside ourselves first. So next time the pressure rises or things get loud in your head, pause and ask: “Am I stuck in the jar, or reading the label?”
That moment of awareness is where performance begins.
Manage the moments!
Julie
P.S. I have a few openings for teams for 2025-26. Let’s work together! Shoot me an email or text – juliej@ssbperformance.com or 234-206-0946. We can build a program that fits your team!
Julie Jones
Mental Performance Coach
SSB Performance
juliej@ssbperformance.com • 234-206-0946
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